1. Use the mailing machine for personal use.
2. Get a reputation as the office gossip. Do anything that gets you a ‘reputation.’
3. Hit on every new girl.
4. Talk really, really loudly on your phone.
5. Take your cell phone into meetings.
6. Wear clothes that are least one step below the norm.
7. Always take an extra 10 minutes for lunch.
8. Make your boss explain everything in the smallest detail about every project you do.
9. Correct your boss in front of clients.
10. Assume your job is meaningless so no one will notice your mistakes.
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You’re website looks very good, it was a pleasure to be on you’re. Keep on the good work
11. If your office has a system where you can pay for copies you make, USE IT. Be the ONE person that actually pays for their faxes and copies and keep that receipt handy, just in case. Estimate if you have to, but always estimate UP.
12. If you get off at 6, leave at 6:01 or later.
13. Keep the inside of your car clean and clutter-free as possible. You never know when a co-worker or boss will need a ride to pick up their car at the shop, or someone may want to hitch a ride to a meeting with you. (I gave rides to a co-worker and Manager (different trips) on the SAME day, unplanned).
14. Don’t eat stinky foods at work (brussels sprouts, brocolli, fish) that have to be heated in the microwave. nuf said
15. Don’t keep a pile of personal paperwork on your desk. Stow it if it must be at work.
16. Well decorate cubicles can be lovely, entertaining, fun loving, and show your personality. Keep it to a minimum. Two examples: 1. A woman was new and she loves Betty Boop. She decorated her office with all things boop, including a birdhouse, floor rug, posters, etc. Even after I warned her kindly (as it was not my biz), she didn’t understand how racy those items can be. Management made her cut WAY back. 2. I used to have lots of plants, nick nacks, cool things on the walls, etc. One day I realized that my Supervisor had the impression I was having entirely too much fun at work. When I took a bunch of it home her attitude suddenly changed. (This can also give the impression that you are moving out, so unless you ARE, you may want to mumble something like “I need more space for all my work…” or something equally loyal while you are clearing out.) They actually moved me into a larger area where the previous owner had trashed the place and they couldn’t get her to clean it up any other way than to move her to a smaller space.