44765_zkbzdsdl5hjkcp2c9dcjcc_okI was doing some calculating recently from a galloping horse, and realized that I have spent about 50,000 hours in my office chair. That’s almost six years.

Let’s agree that I am off a bit….”from a galloping horse”….but it’s still five years at least, give or take. Come to think of it, I did do a lot of managing by walking around, even before it had a catchy name, MBWA. Still. Five years.

Never did I have a fancy office chair, either. Always a run-of-the-mill desk chair. Most of my chairs rolled, tilted and could even swing around smartly. Some even had this do-hickey thing/lever underneath that allowed me to adjust the height. I think the office cleaning crew played in my chair once because I can never get it back to that p-e-r-f-e-c-t height. You spend as much time as I do in an office chair and you notice these things.

For those of you who have outside jobs, you may not realize the chair’s importance in the workplace. Many of us spend eight hours a day in our walk-in closet, er, cubicle and we want more attention paid to where we park it our asses.

What we really need is the office chair of 2009.

1. Heat. Some offices are cold so why not a heated chair, like my car? If they can make it even a bit hotter where my lower back hits the chair, score!

2. IPod connections. Let’s get hooked up properly, without the cords running across the desk. Are hidden speakers too much to ask for?

3. The Wii Fit idea. When you step on the Wii Fit board, the little lady says “Ohhh.” This really means “Lard-Ass” but it is a cute reminder just the same, chairs should do that.

4. Make them recline. I mean I-want-to-take-a-15-minute-nap flat.

5. Mood chairs. Ever walk into someone’s cube, with some simple, easy question and the person turns on you like one of Michael Vick’s pitbulls? A chair that turned colors depending on the mood of the sittee would save a lot of hurt feelings. Tell me I’m wrong.

Did I miss anything?

Hat tip: To my friends at CSN Chairs, thanks for the help on this post.