This is not mine.  Still.

By Scott Adams,  THE ULTIMATE CASE STUDY

By now you’ve probably heard the news about the prankster who gave his “friend” a huge penis tattoo on his back.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/27/australian-artist-charged_n_774608.html

My immediate reaction was that this story could be turned into the greatest case study of all time. It contains most of what I learned in business school and half of what I learned from my parents. It is the ultimate parable. Let’s open the valve and see what valuable lessons spill out.

Don’t make decisions while drunk. The story doesn’t say alcohol was involved. But did I mention that one guy tattooed a giant penis on the other guy’s back?

Stay in school and get good grades. Again, the story was silent on the academic achievements of the people involved, but did I mention that one guy tattooed a penis on the other guy’s back?

Test first. Start with something small, such as a leprechaun on an ankle, just to see how the business relationship works out.

Supervision matters. If an employee unexpectedly volunteers for a project that can only be performed behind your back, something bad is going to happen.

Capitalism never sleeps. If someone offers you a free service, you should be suspicious of what he expects to get in return.  It might involve, for example, your friend laughing himself into a near coma.

Jerks never change. The tattoo artist didn’t suddenly become a jerk when he started drawing a penis on his friend’s back. I’m going to say the signals were there.

Credentials matter. If you’re in the market for a brain surgeon, don’t stop when you find a guy who owns a saw.

Network smartly. If there is even the slightest chance that your friend will misspell a gay insult that he secretly tattoos on your back, it’s time to broaden your network of friends.

Don’t believe product reviews. An accomplice of the prankster praised the artwork as it was being drawn.

Solicit opinions from others. Before you decide to get any sort of permanent marking on your back from an unlicensed tattoo artist, find out what other people think of the idea.

I could go on. I think you could build an entire law school curriculum around this case. And I’m pretty sure it would replace a bachelor’s degree in marketing and advertising, unless you think you’ll ever forget the story of the penis tattoo prank.

My point is that every school should build its curriculum around the story of the penis tattoo.  In grade school the kids could learn about the importance of good spelling, resisting peer pressure, and staying in school.  In graduate school, students could learn the legal, economic, and psychological implications of the story. It’s all there, like some sort of fabulous gift from God.

But I’m a little bit suspicious why we got it for free.

Since I have a vested interest in job creation, I thought I would offer up some comments and suggestions.  I am curious if you agree with any/some of them.

1.  Business people are very rational.  Call them calculating or hardnosed, if they can get a part or service across town or ocean, they will.  Most of the programs designed to protect those supplier companies or industries who no longer provide products of services in sufficient quality at a reasonable cost are wrong-headed.  For every person or industry that is “saved” there are others who start to think “why not me?” or the corollary “Where’s my free lunch?”  If “they” start worrying more about getting “theirs” than making their widgets better and faster…well, there’s only so much time in the day.

2.  I question almost all the programs being considered now for job creation or even “entrepreneur development,” now the rage amongst city and state consultants.  Will better tax rates for angel investors or capital gains affect those future Steve Jobs or Mark “fresh facebook” Zuckerberg?  Nah.  They are not sitting in their dorm rooms, thinking that if only the capital gains tax would be reduced by 5% points, THEN I would start this new company.  Sure angel investors are sitting on the sideline.  Big deal.  The true geniuses will adapt and figure out how to finance their new business, or make it profitable right the hell away.  This is what they do.

3.  You would think that with the country tilting to the side of “we’ll take care of you if you fail” crowd, that more fledging startup people would realize this and get ‘r started.  Failure is almost not possible; in fact, bankruptcy in a your first new business is almost a sought-after resume builder.  ( I know someone who actually teaches this.)

4.  I think there is mostly one thing missing today.  How should I say this?  Mmmm.  Ok, let’s call it MOXY.  I really wanted to say courage, nerves or BALLS, but that seemed a bit too testosterone-y, but you know what I mean.  Moxy it is.  There’s money on the sidelines, waiting to be invested in new ideas.  SUPPOSEDLY.  In my own case, I have presented at least two relatively big ideas to companies who should have jumped all in.  Instead they didn’t.  The people running biz development efforts at most companies should be fired.  Seriously.  What is the opposite of “BALLS?”  That’s what they have.  Company CEO’s should be asking to see all the rejected ideas.  Ok, Ok, so what is my solution?  What can you do now, all by your lonesome?

5.  Is the solution lower taxes on new companies?  That would help.  How about making every investment in a new idea or company free from being taxed for a decade.  That would help, too.  Here is something easier and faster.  Every town and community has a stud or studette entrepreneur.  They don’t live in the biggest house, but you know who they are.  Celebrate them to the community.  Ask them to speak.  Ask them to teach a class to 8th graders.  Ask them to mentor ten younger people.  Make them big time local heroes.  Give them a billboard.  Ask them to come to your own company and give a lunch time talk.

Show people it is ok to have moxy.

Again.

School is starting.  For most kids, big whoop.  But for some, a real and true Big Whoop.  I don’t know what to make about education nowadays.  We are spending more money on it, so I know we all care.

I know venture guys who are big backers of online universities, like DeVry, Capella, and Phoenix.  And I know people in HR who are dismissive of each when they try to fill all those open jobs.  I think these schools must still be finding their way.  In a decade or two,  more of us will come to understand how good an education can be like this, even online.

And then I read that Bill Gates, HIMSELF, is a big fan of something called the Khan Academy.  Evidently, Bill and his kids review these videos on a consistent basis.  They are so well done, I am thinking about watching the video on quadratic equations…just to see how much I have forgotten in 10, 20, 30, 40 years.  Realistically, though, something tells me that Bill’s kids are going to be smart enough, no-matter-fricking-what, but it is is noteworthy that he uses this free resource to help his kids get prepared.  Beats reading THE CAT IN THE HAT every night at bedtime.  Or does it.

Related sidebar–When I mentor young folks on entrepreneurship, I always mention that most start up people I know have a combo gene of Urgency and Delayed Gratification.  Urgency because one must have a ‘git-r-done’ mentality and Delayed Gratification because often the payoff is years ahead.  Sometimes the two don’t mesh very well.  Education is like that.  The pay off is years ahead.

So this brings me to the other hot button of mine, as it relates to job seekers.  I am amazed at the little things that job seekers do NOT do.  Basically, most are ill prepared. The stats are that job seekers spend way less than one hour a day job seeking.  So, I guess it is not realistic to give advice like I  have in the past, suggesting that they practice answering interview questions, or practicing their self elevator pitch.  Few do.  Again, job seekers, practice this stuff…it is even legal to do this before your interview.  Enough.

Malcolm Gladwell in OUTLIERS wrote about the 10,000 hour rule.  Basically, it takes about 10,000 hours to become expert at anything.  Wow.  But.  True.  What is that like?

Much of our success is really based upon practicing our skill whether it is critical thinking, dribbling with our left hand, drywalling or how to be more likeable.

Scott Adams, the Dilbert Guy, may have stumbled on to a big idea here, without realizing it.  Maybe someone today will read his essay today, and put two and two together.  That’s still four, right?

Here is his essay in its entirety cuz I know you are too busy to make the jump.

Let’s say that you and I decide to play pool. We agree to play eight-ball, best of five games. Our perception is that what follows is a contest to see who will do something called winning.

But I don’t see it that way. I always imagine the outcome of eight-ball to be predetermined, to about 95% certainty, based on who has practiced that specific skill the most over his lifetime. The remaining 5% is mostly luck, and playing a best of five series eliminates most of the luck too.

I’ve spent a ridiculous number of hours playing pool, mostly as a kid. I’m not proud of that fact. Almost any other activity would have been more useful. As a result of my wasted youth, years later I can beat 99% of the public at eight-ball. But I can’t enjoy that sort of so-called victory. It doesn’t feel like “winning” anything.

It feels as meaningful as if my opponent and I had kept logs of the hours we each had spent playing pool over our lifetimes and simply compared. It feels redundant to play the actual games.

I see the same thing with tennis, golf, music, and just about any other skill, at least at non-professional levels. And research supports the obvious, that practice is the main determinant of success in a particular field.

As a practical matter, you can’t keep logs of all the hours you have spent practicing various skills. And I wonder how that affects our perception of what it takes to be a so-called winner. We focus on the contest instead of the practice because the contest is easy to measure and the practice is not.

Complicating our perceptions is professional sports. The whole point of professional athletics is assembling freaks of nature into teams and pitting them against other freaks of nature. Practice is obviously important in professional sports, but it won’t make you taller. I suspect that professional sports demotivate viewers by sending the accidental message that success is determined by genetics.

My recommendation is to introduce eight-ball into school curricula, but in a specific way. Each kid would be required to keep a log of hours spent practicing on his own time, and there would be no minimum requirement. Some kids could practice zero hours if they had no interest or access to a pool table. At the end of the school year, the entire class would compete in a tournament, and they would compare their results with how many hours they spent practicing. I think that would make real the connection between practice and results, in a way that regular schoolwork and sports do not. That would teach them that winning happens before the game starts.

Yes, I know that schools will never assign eight-ball for homework. But maybe there is some kid-friendly way to teach the same lesson.

Up here in Minnesota, we have arguably the best baseball player in America in Joe Mauer.  He’s a good kid, too.

True story.  Some group had a special luncheon where the guest of honor was Joe Himself.  All ten guests were excited to meet him.  If Lindsay Lohan were in the hotel, they wouldn’t have noticed.  But JOE MAUER.  Grown men get wistful for days past by…baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet.  Someone said, “He’s here!”  So, they all grabbed their chairs, sat down and waited.  No Joe.  Joe?  Finally, he walked in.  He had stopped to block print “JOE MAUER” on the nametag.  You know, just in case no one knew him.

So, ….Lebron.  Singlehandedly, LJ made people love Cleveland more AFTER he left.  Did  you hear the guy who said, “We’re ok, Cleveland’s used to losing.”  It is hard to pity an entire city, but that made me a bit sad.

In related news, Joe will play tonight in the ALL STAR game even though he is nursing a sore shoulder.  He left his posse back home.

If you are a man, reading this, jump over now and read Scott’s piece.  If you are a girl, don’t bother.  You just won’t get it.

You will marvel at it.  It’s that good.  Mah-va-lous.

Our development team used all the Ipad features and functionality.  This is not some slap it together, let’s get it out Ipad app.  It is not an universal app either…you know, one that was really made for the IPhone, but now made to fit on the IPad, but it just floats in the middle like a piece of software crap an embarrassing signal of development incompetence for the entire world to see and unmarvel at…NOT our LINKUP app.

Like Billy Crystal said, “It’s just mahvelous.”

If you have an Ipad, download it. Then browse around.  If you have a job you can see all the other companies who are now beginning to hire–over 450,000 job openings whoohoo.  Real jobs, open, and mostly un-advertised elsewhere.

If you don’t have an Ipad, the LinkUp app is a good reason to get one.

Just saying.

Ed note. You can check out LinkUp Ipad features here.

He makes his living as a graphic artist…and I have used him with great results.  So this morning I am watching the Morning News Shows where, no surprise, the news about BP’s oil spill dominates.  Don’t even get me started.

At that time, about three hours ago, Michael shoots me a message and asks if I have any work for him.  On a whim, I tell him if he can come up with a new BP logo, reflecting todays’ reality, that I would post it.  It is interesting to me to see how small the world is these days, and how someone in Romania can be so clued in.  Truth: I am not sure I could FIND Romania on a map.

Anyway, he sent me these two logos.  Blame him.  He can be reached at www.visualupgrade.com.